As Christians we are called to live the new life that Jesus, the Christ and Saviour, has called us to. However we sometimes ask ourselves to what extent we are living that new life as we are so aware of our own failings and human weaknesses. We try to overcome them but are not always successful. Recently I came accross what I have found to be very helpful advice. It was not in the Bible or in a spiritual book but in a novel by Dick Francis.
A character in one of his books was asked how he was able to be so strong when he had to face very difficult situatiions. His reply was that he looked deeply into his own heart to discover his motives. He said that to control, change or strengthen his actions, it was first necessary to understand himself and why he acted in such a way. As is often said in detective stories to understand the how, it is first necessary to discover the why.
I am aware that I often judge and criticize others so I will ask myself why I do that. What are my hidden motives? Why am I irritated with what Gustavo is doing? I discover that I am annoyed because he does things in a different way to me and I am sure that my way is the best way, so what he is doing is obviously wrong. So then I have to ask myself why I think that I am always right and I realise that it is because of my pride.
Similarly I can become annoyed when another person takes over a group I am in. When I analyse my motives, I see that it is because I want to be the important person in the group. Once again, I find that my underlying pride is determining my actions. So now if I want to change, I know where I have to start.
Wisdom exists in many places and today I thank God that I found it in a detective story.
Fr Don Hornsey lives and works in Aotearoa/New Zealand
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